How do I help my sis relax about her teenage son's ';discovery';?

My sis called me today all upset because she found some magazines in her sons bedroom. (He is 12 almost 13) and she found a Victorias Secret %26amp; a Maxim under his pillow. She is totally freaking out! I tried to tell her it is a normal age %26amp; almost all boys do this. She thinks he is too young, and even tho I agree that the Maxim material is a bit too crass %26amp; sexual, I dont think she should confront %26amp; embarass him. I told her if she does not want him reading this mag, her husband shouldnt have it in the house. What can I say to calm her down, and what should I tell her to say to her son. I know they have had ';the talk'; and seem pretty open about discussing sex, and I am afraid if she embarrasses him, he may not come to her in the future. Help!How do I help my sis relax about her teenage son's ';discovery';?
I have three boys, and I've been through this with two of them. The maturity level is the key. My oldest son was mature for his age so when I found those magazines in his room, my only response was ';don't let your younger brother see them';. That was our only issue. Your friend should talk to her son. Even if they act all embarrassed and try to shut her up, the topic has been opened. Her son will talk to someone, or he'll mention something to prod his parents into talking to him. Tell her to just open the door and he will eventually walk through.How do I help my sis relax about her teenage son's ';discovery';?
don't worry about it to much. Its a guy thing. At least she knows hes not gay right? just kidding lol but she needs to have a male or father talk to him about it. Its nothing to be embarrassed about but she can really screw things up if she goes at it wrong
I think mommy is just upset that her little boy is growing up. It's not easy. And as far as the Maxim? Chances are the school probably passed them out. Really! Besides. Isn't it better that he have them available then to find out he's ';active'; and not protected? At least he's smart about it. I worked at a store and one of my son's friends came in and purchased them. He apologized to me cause I was his friend's mother. I told him that I would rather check him out with them then to find out that he got aids without them. Suddenly he just shook his head and said...your right. It wasn't my job to criticize. Only to check him out and give him a receipt. He felt good about himself, told me goodbye and to have a nice nite. I told him same thing. We laughed and that was it. I didn't know what else to say but hey. If they are gonna do it then at least let them do it right. She's better off just letting it go. Tell her to chill and to complain to you so that it doesn't make her head blow off. She'll calm down in time. I did. I was panic stricken.
Tell her exactly what you just said. It is normal. As a matter of fact my 13 year old cousin was caught on the internet with persons doing different sexual things. Remember this is 2007


not 1950 the tecnology is better and kids learn faster. Let the course of life go on. The worst thing is to confront him on his behavoir. You never know he may turn out to be a person of reason. Take no action. Please, this will only embarras him.
Your sister should just chill out before she says something really stupid. My son discovered himself this past summer and he became more careful around his sister and me. I told him to come to me or his dad if there was anything he needed answered and he came to me 2 times already and i did my best to answer him open and honest and he is OK with him self and your newphew is not to young
no need to get all bent out of shape over magazines
your advise sounds perfect!!!! good job
i've somewhat of the same problem,it's just teenage hormones
her boy is smart because he knows he can get victoria secret magaeans but not playboy hes samart
tell her to let go of her son, she will be giving him teddy bears when he is 21. your lucky he is not in gang, smoking, drugs, and/or alcohol. tell her what he might be doing in stead of what he is doing now. My friends have men mag's in there room. I see cross dressers in my school. and boys buying from Victoria's secret ( some are guy but most buy it for there girl friend). may be he needs to find out what his dream girl is. Trust me my step dad talks about his life all the time, what what your nephew is doing is very mild to what my step dad did.
You are going in the right direction. She should not embarass him about the magazines. At his age I was ';enjoying'; the underwear ads in the Sears catalog. He is at that age. If your sister knew what the kids discussed at school she would probably keep him home. Good luck with your sister, you seem to have the correct approach.
say at least its not ';hustler'; honey


hey now you dont need to give him the ';talk


he knows what sex IS


so thats good.


at thirteen I lost my virginity,


so say hes actually MILD
you should have her tell her son that it is natural, and all boys get curious at some age, around 13, and it isnt wrong to ';discover'; new things. she should say also that its not a healthy habit, but everyone has their urges.
The most important thing is not to shame him. If she shames him he wont come to her for anything and he'll be embarasses about stuff like that. At least it was her son and it wasnt her little brother like me....
Sounds like puberty to me!





he is probably looking at them prior to or during masturbation which is quite normal for that age of boy. Those are really tame compared to most.





I managed to find my brother's playboy mags when I was starting with that. I think I was 11-12. I'm very normal and raised two kids who are, so That is just a normal and biologically neccessary thing for boys to do. Some look at pictures while and others don't, most do if they can find them.





I would leave him alone and have dad retrieve his magazine and put them up better next time. The catalog is in good taste and he is starting to look at girls so, I think it is fine.
Ask her how old SHE was the first time she did a little self-exploration.